A science lesson with my 13 year-old son this week reminded me of a concept I think is crucial to my homeschool and life in general. The lesson was on, of all things, the skeletal system. While we read about compact and spongy bone, I couldn't help thinking of the compact bone and the spongy bone of my life: structure & flexibility.
My life has a great deal of structure in it. I get up when I know I must, I eat when I know I should (I'm still working on this part), I have a time for reading, studying, exercising, cleaning, teaching, cooking, and resting. I get up everyday having a really good idea of what needs to happen to make my life work and my family run smoothly. Most days I get those things done, or at least I come close.

The other important part of what my life is about is flexibility. If something better than I had planned comes up on any given day, something I hadn't planned, I want to be able to say yes to that thing. I don't want to miss out on some really good things in my life because I am so rigid I couldn't give a little. The thing that comes up some days might not be some wonderful opportunity - it might be a sick kid, a need in our extended family, or a project we believe in at church. I still want to prioritize people over accomplishment, flexibility over structure.

A structure built in an earthquake zone is built with that quake in mind. It has to have structure or it's not going to stand. If structure is all it has, it will crumble when the quakes come. Do any of us have lives that don't quake once in a while? No one I've met. The thing that makes the difference is flexibility.

There are many wonderful families who major on one or the other of these qualities. I'm sure they will raise good children who are a blessing to our world. I'm not sure how it works for them, but for me, it simply does not work without both. Of course, at the root of it all, WHAT you're building on is as important as HOW you build. We have to have a sure foundation, a solid Chief Cornerstone and be built on the Solid Rock of God and His word. Like most moms, I'm trying to find the balance that makes life work. I'm so thankful that God has given me the structure of His holiness and justice and the flexibility of His grace and love.

Guilty!

I'm a regular homeschool mom with five wonderful children with whom I am blessed to pass the days. There is very little to distinguish our family from any other you might see arguing their way down the aisles of Walmart.
Everyone has their own ideas about what a homeschooler is and what they should do. You know the stereotypes - long hair to match the long skirts, a deep and intense interest in reading, superior intelligence and a superiority complex to match, winners of spelling bees and social outcasts with no idea how to behave when let out into the real world.
I know lots of homeschool families, as we've been at this for about 13 years now. Very few people I know fit this stereotype. Our family certainly doesn't. It is in no way my desire to look like the world and, too often, to act like it, but, sadly, we mostly do. It's not been by design or by a conscious effort to avoid looking 'homeschoolish', but by virtue of the fact that we live in the real world and are fully functioning people in it.
I have never ground my own wheat and I'm a pretty lousy bread maker. Some of my children (and I say this to my utter shame) hate to read and would never read if I didn't force them to do so. My house is seldom clean and my children, while having plenty of chores to do, have to be reminded too many times to count before they actually do them. They argue with one another, love the computer, and watch too much tv.
Some days all of the above is enough for me to cite myself for dereliction of duty and convict myself of being the worst homeschool mother in the world. Add to the list the fact that I sometimes yell at the children, and you might as well throw in the death sentence. More nights than I care to admit, I go to bed feeling frustrated and guilty.
In my saner moments, I realize we're not doing everything wrong. We're just a regular family, trying to honor God, and train godly, loving, responsible children while we work out our own salvation and battle our own bad habits and sinful natures. That's quite a lot to do - especially in a time and place where doing so amounts to fighting an uphill battle.
So begins the blog of this regular homeschool mom. I'm not going to try to impress you with how spiritual we are, how smart we are, or how together we have everything. That would all be a lie. I will tell you the things that frustrate me, the things that delight me, and the things that keep me going. Just maybe you will be able to relate. :)